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The 5 Signs That Let You Know You're A Transfer Addict

Conor O'Leary
By Conor O'Leary
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It's transfer silly season, and that means that no matter where you look there will be rumours, #sources, bids being prepared, and confident claims from "people close to the player".

There are two types of people when it comes to dealing with transfer news and rumours:

1) People who don't really pay much attention until it's confirmed.
2) Transfer muppets.

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Here are the five signs that can let you know if you are in fact a transfer muppet, so you can get some help. Unless you're happy to be a transfer muppet, in which case, keeping doing your thing.

1. You draft up potential line-ups for next season featuring players that haven't even been linked to the club yet.


Yes,
we did do this earlier today, but this is the least harmful trait of a transfer muppet, so hopefully you'll forgive us for that.

2. You are aware of a potential transfer target following new people on social media.


That's right, some Manchester United fans became aware of the fact that Memphis Depay followed United youngster (and former PSV teammate) Andreas Pereira on Instagram last night. In this case it did actually turn out to be a hint, but please don't do this. It's bad for your mental health.

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3. You actively search Twitter for transfer news for your club by using the club hashtag.


Why would you do this to yourself? That twitter account with 400 odd followers isn't going to break the news before Sky Sports or The Guardian.

4. You photoshop a potential signing into the club kit to "see what he'd look like".


The only thing that this can result in is embarrassment. This is the worst sign that you're a transfer muppet.

5. You follow this guy on twitter.


Come on. You know yourself you're not just following for the laughs.

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See also: Who Is Indykaila? We Investigate Twitter’s Most Famous Transfer Bullshitter

 

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