The Guardian's Daniel Taylor has produced a fascinating read on the demise of Louis Van Gaal's Manchester United empirical empire. We fully advise you to read the full piece here. Of the many fascinating details, this was the most eye-catching:
Over time, the players started ignoring the rule, complaining that they should be allowed to think for themselves (though the story of one player asking United’s chef to hard-boil him a couple of eggs to take home, on the basis he did not know how to do it himself, suggests that maybe some members of the squad do need coddling).
Yep, one of those highly-paid men at Manchester United has not sufficiently developed as a human being to learn the intricate skill of boiling an egg. Eggs can, admittedly, be treacherous things: former Rangers player Kirk Broadfoot missed time through injury having been scalded while attempting to poach an egg.
The culprit behind this astonishing ignorance has been revealed by Neil Ashton of The Sun. It is Matteo Darmian:
Far from being an egghead, the Italian full back left training one day having asked the club’s chef to hard boil him two eggs because he thought he might be hungry when he got home.
We had originally thought it was Marcos Rojo. Look at his awful approach to toast: