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Breaking Down The Pre-Tackle Thought Process Of Marcos Rojo

Mikey Traynor
By Mikey Traynor
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Marcos Rojo... Is a nutter.

Not in the endearing "ah he's a mental bastard, but he's our mental bastard" way that Eric Bailly has been welcomed with open arms by the Manchester United faithful, but in the "he could get sent off at literally any moment" way, that is actually really problematic.

At the weekend, Rojo put in an outrageous two-footed tackle on Idrissa Gueye that was somehow only deemed a yellow. Having come so close to a very, very costly red card in that match, you'd think he'd be focused on keeping his cool against Crystal Palace on Wednesday night...


But you would be wrong.

Marcos Rojo flew into another ridiculous challenge that Wilfried Zaha had to jump to avoid, and again it was only a yellow.

Here's a quick look into what we believe went on in the mind of Rojo as the incident happened:

1 - "He's going inside, I'm in a great position here."

2 - "I've reacted slowly, now I need to make a challenge, better not go in two-footed, everybody has been talking about me as a dirty player after Everton."

3 - "Fuck that, let's wreck this speedy prick. No prisoners."

4 - "Don't forget to point the toe for maximum damage."

5 - "Shite, I've missed him.. This is going to look bad isn't it?"

6 - "That's never a yellow ref, I'd know I've seen a thousand of them."

7 - "The game is gone, when I was a lad it wasn't a proper game if you left the pitch with both kneecaps intact."

He's been playing well lately, but he won't be playing much at all if he keeps up this trend of going into a tackle like he's jumping onto a water-slide.




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