It's called silly season for a reason. The summer transfer window is always fraught with an incredible amount of twaddle, and we should be grateful that we had the spectacle of the World Cup to distract us from the mountains of nonsense that come with the wheeling and dealing of the off season.
But alas, as football fans, it is hard not to get sucked into the circus of it all, with links to players however tenuous whipping supporters into a frenzy over the potential of the upcoming season.
So just to ground the more excitable football supporter, here are eight bullshit transfer indicators that you should avoid at all cost.
Agent liking photo of photoshopped player
With Liverpool's recent signing of Brazil keeper Alisson Becker, some eagle-eyed fan noticed that Alisson's agent liked a picture of the player photoshopped into a Liverpool top. Now, we all know that this transfer did end up going through, but if you're pinning your hopes for the new season on a football agent's Instagram habits then the game, I'm afraid, is gone.
Flight tracking is a relatively new way of determining whether a player is going to sign for a specific club, with masses of fans refreshing flight tracking sites to see if that Boeing 747 is heading for Manchester or London.
— Transfer News Live (@DeadlineDayLive) January 30, 2018
Cousin/wife/pet dog starts to follow rumoured club
Here is Alvaro Morata's missus following Manchester United. The Spanish international would sign for Chelsea weeks later.
ITKs or In The Knows are usually just fake accounts hungry for followers who will rehash any story, or spin any bullshit rumour to attract attention. Avoid like the plague.
— Steve Bloomer's Washing ? (@SteveBloomerPod) July 24, 2018
Indykaila is the grandaddy of them all:
Welcome To... Videos
We've all been down this path before. Some player you've never heard from gets linked with your club and it's straight onto Youtube to see if he's any use. You type in the name and will be met with an inevitable glut of highlights videos that seem to intimate that the player has already signed on the dotted line.
The leaked jersey pics
Liverpool fans look away now. Life is suffering.
Official Twitter accounts
Such is the post truth landscape we find ourselves in, we can no longer trust even news coming from the source. Roma found this out to their dismay as Barcelona hijacked their deal for Bordeaux player Malcolm.
The property market
A football fan should not pin their hopes and dreams on the whim of a multi-millionaire.
Rumour going around Naples, Ibrahimovic is looking for a house in the city.
— Jack Rathborn (@JackRathborn) July 6, 2013