There are many terribly confused football fans out there. They have no idea where anyone is from, don't don't know their Ligue 1 from their League One and they think Gareth Bale will never top his performance in American Psycho.
Ladies and gentlemen, we give to you all the views of the most discombobulated, misinformed, needs to go back to school armchair critic in the world.
Thinks Shane Long's performance last night warrants an England call-up
Image: Shane Hegarty
Was devastated when Batman left Tottenham Hotspur for Real Madrid
Goes into a deep political analysis when explaining why the Spanish doesn't sing the national anthem
Thanked their lucky stars Lewandowski wasn't playing against England
But was upset that James Morrison didn't feature
Garth Crooks' article on BBC Sport:
Thinks Man City should never have sacked their last manager, Mario Balotelli
Remembers Roy Hodgson for his playing days
Is taking a keen interest in Gervinho's performances on loan at Crystal Palace this season
Hopes that Aaron Ramsey can still play a big role for England in the World Cup
Has a deep respect for Vicente Del Bosque, managing Spain for pittance
(He actually gets €1.5m)