Conservapedia's Football Entry

Conservapedia's Football Entry
By Donny Mahoney Updated

 

 

Did you know that Conservapedia, the wikipedia for affluent, aging white racists, has an entry on football? Did you know this entry addresses the connection between 'socialism and soccer'?

Among our favourites:

  • Soccer coaches only need a vocabulary of about 100 words to coach their teams [6], which is reminiscent of socialist pandering to the lowest common denominator. At least twice as many conservative words alone originated in the 20th century.
  • The World Cup trophy resembles socialist Hollywood's Emmy Award.
  • The "off-sides" rule prohibits using certain aggressive ("unfair") tactics in the game.
  • In youth leagues, everyone gets a trophy for their efforts regardless of achievement, and there is no scoring in the game.

Tell me this is satire.

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