Man Utd's injury woes worsened on Sunday when both Eric Bailly and Luke Shaw departed early the 1-1 draw with Swansea at Old Trafford.
Shaw had to be replaced after just 10 minutes and then Bailly after an hour.
In the tone of a parent suggesting that a child better have a good excuse, Mourinho said Shaw's injury must have been bad for him to be forced off so early in the game.
I think Luke Shaw's must be a big injury, because to leave the pitch after 10 minutes I am expecting a very big injury.
At the moment, we cannot walk from the bed to the toilet and break a leg.
Mourinho also had a further dig at both Phil Jones and Chris Smalling. Both players have missed all nine of Man Utd's games in April, neither have played since their side's 3-1 win against Middlesbrough on March 19th.
Asked if there was any update regarding the pair, Mourinho said he did not want to talk about them, instead choosing to speak about the 'brave' Juan Mata who was making considerable effort to be available for selection.
I prefer not to speak. I prefer not to speak. I prefer to say brave guy Mata trying everything to be available. I'm grateful for that.
It's the fourth time in recent weeks that Mourinho has had a go at both Smalling and Jones. Earlier this week, he bemoaned their 'cautious' approach to being injured.
— eirSport (@eirSport) April 30, 2017