Stephen Hawking Is No Fan Of Luis Suarez

By PJ Browne
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In conjunction with Paddy Power, Stephen Hawking has published a paper on how England can with the World Cup.


The theoretical physicist has determined the shirt colour, team formation, nationality of referee and environmental conditions which could lead to an England victory in Brazil.

The professor also calculated how to take the perfect penalty. "Giving it welly" is key, as is placement, with the top left or right-hand corner being the optimal place to stick the ball. Interestingly he also says that bald and fair-haired players are more likely the score.

The best part of the video though is him calling Luis Suarez a "ballerina".


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