Andrea Bocelli raised the bar for football celebrations last weekend. It was a bar that West Ham was not able to meet in their farewell to Upton Park, in a ceremony which concluded with an odd rockified version of 'Forever Blowing Bubbles', which failed to energise the crowd.
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Social media howled with derision when it became apparent that West Ham's farewell to their stadium wasn't going to match the London Olympics opening ceremony as a spectacle. This seemed like an unreasonable expectation.
Two Laaandan presenters, Ben Sheppard and Bianca Westwood interviewed the likes of Paolo Di Canio and the compulsive controversialist Trevor Brooking on the pitch at the end.
It was clearly determined that Geoff Hurst didn't boast enough star power to be allowed participate in the event. So, they wisely decided to hear what Carlton Cole, Marlon Harewood and Anton Ferdinand had to say.
The highlight was unquestionably the end when they allowed 'Bobby Moore' to switch off the lights.
Simple yet brilliant way to say goodbye to Upton Park. Bobby Moore turns off the lights. pic.twitter.com/ea3i00MMOO
— GolfCentralDaily (@golfcentraldoc) May 10, 2016
Will felt for those public spirited and devoted West Ham fans who possibly inconvenienced themselves to hear Carlton Cole say a few words.
Seriously... if I missed the last tube because I was listening to Carlton Cole speak to Bianca Westwood I would be absolutely livid!!!
— Will Gavin (@WillGav) May 10, 2016
No mention of Hurst, Martin, Lamps snr, Arry, Stewart, Carr, McAvennie at Hammers do? Marlon Harewood tho
— Larry Ryan (@RyanLarry) May 10, 2016
Martin Peters and Geoff Hurst won a World Cup while playing for West Ham and they interviewed Carlton Cole and Marlon Harewood
— aidan o'hara (@oharaa) May 10, 2016
Marlon Harewood being interviewed about Pardew's 2006 touchline scrap with Wenger ... not quite what you imagined the Boleyn send-off to be
— Sam Wallace (@SamWallaceTel) May 10, 2016
Geoff Hurst scored a World Cup Final hat-trick for England, but Bianca thought it was more appropriate to speak to Anton Ferdinand...
— Timothy le Breton (@Timlebreton) May 10, 2016
FA absolutely right to investigate West Ham after tonight's ugly scenes. Ben Shephard and Bianca Westwood? Disgusting.
— Josh Warwick (@Joshy_No4) May 10, 2016
All the supporters' memories of Upton Park are from Sky Sports years. When football began. No one has a memory of the ground before 1992...
— Dale Johnson (@dalejohnsonESPN) May 10, 2016
This West Ham tribute looks worse than Laochra
— Kevin Byrne (@KevByrneBox) May 10, 2016
Bowie & Prince would have loved a send off like this. You would think West Ham were moving to Nicaragua/folding, not 3 miles down the road.
— Ed Quigley (@Longshot_Ted) May 10, 2016
Oh dear, the west ham send off has turned into holiday camp entertainment.. Are we having fun? "groovey"
— Tony McCool (@antmccool7) May 10, 2016
This West Ham send off party is criminal. Looks like it was arranged by a transition year student #WHUMUN
— Darragh Wynne (@iamDwynne) May 10, 2016
What a tasteful, understated farewell to Upton Park this is...
— Dean Van Nguyen (@deanvannguyen) May 10, 2016
There was a great deal of anxious murmuring when Trevor Brooking slipped and referred to the ground as Upton Park, as we have throughout this post.
Oh no, Trevor Brooking called it Upton Park.
Probably gonna get fined by Sky.
— Seán Sheehan (@SeanSheehanBA) May 10, 2016
Sky Producers screaming in Trevor Brooking's lug to stop saying Upton Park!
— Gareth Bainbridge (@GazBainbridge) May 10, 2016
Over on the #FarwellBoleyn hashtag, things were a lot more positive.
— Carys Thomas (@CarysAnnT) May 10, 2016
— Jamie Thomas (@jamieathomasuk) May 10, 2016