We're only a few days into the transfer window and weirdly it's Everton who have taken the market by storm, signing five players at a cost of £83 million -- and they're still not finished their business for the summer. It will be so heartwarming to see them finish seventh again come the end of the season. Of course, Man United, Arsenal and Chelsea are all up to the usual wheeling and dealing today in the latest round of transfer window news.
Man United Want Everyone, As Per Usual
I'm sure if I were to do some actual research I would find the ratio of signings United make compared to the vast amount of players they're rumoured to be interested in. It's probably in the region of 1:10000000000000.
Today's no different, as Jose Mourinho lusts after Marc Bartra, the Borussia Dortmund centre-back, as he's set to miss out on Monaco's Fabinho. Ivan Perisic is still on their radar for some reason, while apparently, Alvaro Morata is trying to push through a move. His dad and agent had a meeting with Real Madrid bosses on Monday as the Champions League winners hold out for €90 million.
Chelsea Close To Signing Juventus Full-Back
A lot of money is close to being dropped by the Blues for Alex Sandro, which would be a stellar signing. Full-backs are all the rage these days.
Arsenal Taking Their Time
Alexandre Lacazette may have been announced by the time you read this (Sky Sports claim he's having his medical today), but they're making slow work of it. That, and the signing of Riyad Mahrez, who they somehow haven't been able to tempt away from Leicester yet.
Dynamic Duo At Goodison Park?
Not content with their haul thus far, Everton are in for both Olivier Giroud and Wayne Rooney. This is why the Toffees brought in the much-lauded scout Steve Walsh. For maximum banter.
If you don't want to see an Everton attack that consists of Wayne Rooney and Olivier Giroud, you are an enemy of football.
— MUNDIAL (@MundialMag) July 3, 2017
So far Everton have snapped up Jordan Pickford, Michael Keane, Davy Klaassen, Henry Onyekuru and Sandro Ramirez.
Chicarito Returning To The Premier League?
Javier Hernandez is being linked with a move to West Ham United, which would be quite the signing for them considering the dumpster fire of a transfer window they had last year.
And Now For The Weather In Spain
Dani Ceballos was a part of the insanely good Spanish youth side that lost out to Germany in the U-21 Euros final last week, and as a result he has become a very wanted man. Apparently, both Real Madrid and Barcelona are fighting between themselves for his signature.
Theo Hernandez landed in Madrid fresh from his Las Vegas holiday to finalise a deal to the Estadio Santiago Bernabeu from cross-town rivals Atleti. If that sounds underwhelming, then take a look at this outrageous goal he scored while on loan at Deportivo Alaves against Barcelona in the Copa Del Rey final.
Which Bray Wanderers Players Are Available?
All of them.