11 Things We Miss About Old School GAA
The GAA has undergone a revolution in recent years but there were certain styles that existed in Old School GAA that we thought would last the test of time. Sadly, they didn't make it but we can always look back fondly on a simpler time when fashion wasn't as high on the priority list of some of the game's greatest players.
White Painters Gloves
These gloves offered a clear disadvantage to whoever put them on. They made the ball slippier than it needed to be and were only worn because they were free and the manager arrived in the door with 200 pairs in a bundle. You can also throw Mikasa gloves in here too and although they did offer substantially more grip, they were too big and you almost felt like a cheap imitation of Mickey Mouse when flapping at a ball.
Sos Dowling, Kildare, with a pair of white soggy painter's gloves. Pointless.
Jerseys That Could Have Doubled As Sleeping Bags
The light, breathable jerseys you get nowadays are a new invention. There was a time when Old School GAA players around the country would have to carry the heaviest, baggiest jerseys imaginable around the field for sixty minutes – as a test of endurance. If it happened to be a cold day or you got a slap across the chest, you would be left with the reddest and rawest nipples this side of the Shannon for the rest of the game. You could have had the biggest biceps in the country but with these duvets on, nobody would never guess.
Joe Higgins with the XXXXXXXXL.
Fake Sliotars
There was a time before the Celtic Tiger when corners were cut at every opportunity and this expanded into the realm of the GAA. Managers would arrive in with the heaviest sliotars they could find and after two belts of a hurley, they would split open to reveal a mountain of compact turf mould inside. They were notoriously difficult to hit far and the vibrations sent up the wrists and forearms from hitting one would cause arthritis in later life.
Deep Heat
With advancements in physio practise came the end of deep heat. Sales of the fiery substance ceased to exist when lads realised that you weren't actually treating the injury but deflecting the pain to another area of your body with the rawest red mark you could think of. The smell of deep heat in a dressing room meant that things were getting serious and championship was around the corner.
"Let's apply as much deep heat as we can find in order to singe the hair and skin clean off his legs."
Loose Socks
Before young lads started wearing normal, everyday socks out onto the football field, there was such a thing as O'Neill's socks and they were the real deal. They had no elastic at the top of them and on a wet day you could expect to find them buried at the bottom of your football boot leading to a strange sensation whenever you kicked the ball. It was almost as if it was someone else's foot you were kicking it with. There were regular breaks to root out the rogue sock from your boot only for it to fall below the ankle and into the boot again thirty seconds later.
Those socks are getting dangerously low there, Seamus.
Corner forwards standing in the corners
There was a time when corner forwards did exactly what it said on the tin. They would stand as close to the corner as possible and make the straightest line runs you will ever see. Strong correlation between this and cruciate knee ligaments it is believed. It was less like football and more like a 100 metre sprint at the community games.
The Nally Stand
The cheapest tickets you could find and a place where every young lad and young one were hoarded into on days out to Croker. The view was limited and all of the older people would get annoyed with your childish chants but you would be so loaded up on Score Cola and Dairy Milks that there was no stopping you.
When Hurling Helmets Were Not Mandatory
Seriously, how primitive and barbaric was this? The number of retirements by older lads who couldn't come to terms with having to wear a helmet was scandalous. One simple flick of a hurley and you were left picking your teeth up off the field with broken fingers. Every dentist in Ireland mourned the day that helmets were made mandatory.
You're just looking for trouble at this stage, Jamesy.
No Cards
You might not have been sure if you were booked or not but there was no doubt when you had been sent off. It was just the referee pointing in the direction of the dressing room and presumably telling you to "go home ya pup". The fact that everyone thought Gaelic gams were getting "too complicated" with the introduction of the yellow and red cards tell us a lot about how simple a folk we are.
Short Shorts
In comparison to basketball, soccer and other sports' shorts they are, even now, remarkably short and if you've ever been to the States on a J1 you will have been on the receiving end of some abuse by Americans as to the shortness of your GAA shorts but there was a time when they barely covered your arse. There was more modesty in a pair of speedos but in order to show off the thick thighs of a GAA player, they were necessary.
Paidi leading the way with his shorts shorts.
Goalkeepers refusing to wear gloves
Before Shane Curran and Stephen Cluxton, goalkeepers were expected to stand in goals, try to influence the umpires by waving wide at every shot ever taken, lump the ball on top of midfielders and lick their hands obsessively while waiting for a shot to be taken on them.
Christy Byrne, presumably, getting booked for refusing to wear gloves.
