Yes, 'UFC is real and wrestling is bullshit shit targeted at 12-year-old kids.' I get that but can't a man have a bit of fun with what the UFC would be like if it actually was scripted by the WWE? I mean, they way things are going it's not a million miles away from it any more.
So let's suspend reality for a moment and allow me to bring you on journey. A journey into the imagination of a wrestling fan and how I'd love the McGregor story to play out. I know none of what I'm about to write will ever happen but try telling me this wouldn't be entertaining if it did.
August - December 2015
Where oh where is Jose?
This is a classic wrestling storyline. With McGregor now a firm fan favourite he keeps calling out the villainous Jose Aldo, who has gone into hiding. Week after week McGregor comes down to the octagon and challenges Aldo to a title unification fight but he never responds.
Aldo finally shows up on Christmas Eve, accepts McGregor's challenge and the whole UFC world wets themselves with excitement.
1 January 2016
Did we just become best friends?
A video leaks online of McGregor receiving some wrestling lessons from his former arch-enemy Chad Mendes. It would seem the pair have put the past behind them.
2 January 2016
McGregor v Aldo - Did that just happen!?
The McGregor v Aldo fight kicks off in Las Vegas and it is the fight of a generation. A five-star battle that goes into the final round with no clear winner. It all comes down to the final minute of the final round.
McGregor has Aldo in the arm bar!
His wrestling lessons with Mendes are paying off. Aldo's about to tap. He's going to tap. Conor McGregor is about to become the Unified UFC Featherweight Cham... Wait ... What's this?...
It's Joe Rogan. Joe Fucking Rogan. He's climbed into the octagon and he's got a giant moose leg. HOLY SHIT HE'S JUST KNOCKED MCGREGOR OUT! Rogan clocks McGregor with the moose leg before climbing back out of the cage.
3 January 2016
A monumental fight is booked
McGregor calls a press conference and opens up a can of verbal whoop-ass on Aldo and his buddy Rogan. Aldo comes out and McGregor challenges him to a fight in Croke Park, with Cathal Pendred to fight Joe Rogan and the undercard.
Low and behold, who gate crashes the presser only little Chad Mendes. He argues that McGregor was about to beat Aldo with a move he had taught him. He says he has earned a fight.
Things start to get heated until Dana White has an idea. The next UFC Featherweight Championship fight will be in Croke Park in March and it will be contested by McGregor, Aldo and Mendes. It will be the first ever UFC triple threat match.
26 March 2016
The Easter Rising
The build-up to the fight in Croker is through the roof. Celebs are wheeled out on the world media tour, with David Arquette even becoming UFC heavyweight champion at one press conference for about 10 minutes before Fedor Emelianenko knocks him out.
McGregor builds it as another great Irish warrior taking on a superpower 100 years on from the Easter Rising. Diarmaid Ferriter immediately starts to right a book on the whole thing.
Croke Park sells out. U2 and Nathan Carter open the show. Pendred beats Rogan within an inch of his life before turning on Rogan's coach, Ray Darcy. In the main event, McGregor is utterly dominant. He breaks Aldo's ribs before making Mendes tap out with an arm bar - the very move Mendes had taught him.
He climbs up onto the top of the big screen on the Hill and celebrates with both belts.
6 August 2016
'Mr Kavanagh.... Get the tables!'
Jose Aldo evokes his rematch clause and McGregor defends his title ... in Brazil ... in a hardcore, no holds barred fight.
McGregor wins after he power kicks Aldo through the actual cage. He's finally shut the Brazilian up. He cant rest now. No one can take this away from him. But wait...
The music cuts and out comes Joseph Duffy. The last man to beat Conor McGregor. He wants to face McGregor for the lightweight title. Shit just got real folks!
7 January 2017
A nation divided
Families and friends are completely split over who they want to win. McGregor is great but some are sick of him always winning. Plus he's too damn nice these days. Duffy on the otherhand, has been the best goddamn fighter in the UFC but he never gets billed properly. He's always overlooked by the man.
This time 120,000 fans turn out to UFC 201 in Slane. The rain doesn't dampen the atmosphere as chants of 'Let's go Conor' 'Conor sucks' ring out.
McGregor does it! He beats Joseph Duffy after a tremendous battle and is now both the UFC Featherweight and Lightweight champion. However fans are a little confused, as the fight is over but there's meant to be another 15 minutes left on the show.
That can only mean something big is gunna happen?
7 January 2017 ... again
'Do I have everybody's attention now?'
HOLY FUCKING SHIT!
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT!
IT'S CM PUNK
Punk and Lesnar beat the living shit out of McGregor. This is one of hell of a way for Lesnar to announce his return to the UFC! And Punk, who still actually hasn't had a fight in the UFC, seems to finally have lost patience. They're taking matters into their own hands.
Just as it looks like they might kill McGregor, Joseph Duffy comes back and out and comes to his aid.
And here's Dana White .. And he's with Teddy Long. Teddy takes the mic...
UFC's first ever tag team match begins but it doesn't last long until all hell breaks loose and the match ends in a no contest.
8 July 2017
The Space Race
After being injured by Lesnar and Punk, McGregor finally returns to the octagon, to take part in a cross-weight fight to declare the undisputed champion of the UFC.
Conor McGregor v CM Punk v Brock Lesnar v Joseph Duffy v Jose Aldo v Chad Mendes v Steve Blackman (he's in the UFC by then)
No place on earth was big enough to hold the event so not only is this the first ever seven man, cross-weight UFC championship fight, it's also the first UFC event to take place in space. In front of a 700,000 live audience.
Here's where I end my fantasy predictions and you continue it. Map out how you'd like to see things go, in the comments below. I may even add the best one in to complete the story.