WWE have a big problem.
Today marks the launch of the WWE Network and I've outlined before just how this is an unprecedented, all or nothing move for the company. WrestleMania 30 needs to carry the load for a target of 1 million subscribers, which pretty much means that every person who would typically buy Mania annually in America needs to subscribe for this to be a success.
And yet they closed last night's Elimination Chamber with clip-after-clip of fans looking, not upset in the kind of way that would make them spend money, but apathetic. Losing all hope. Randy Orton vs Batista has tentatively been pencilled in as the Mania main event, but the supposed 'good guy' Batista was booed out of the building to the point that a 'Bootista' chant even broke out. Put simply: people do not want to see this match. And yet it seems set to carry the load for their biggest PPV of the year, after Randy Orton retained his belt in a show-closing Chamber match that saw Kane predictably interfere and cost fan favourite, Daniel Bryan.
WWE have 24 hours to fix the problem. Tonight's Raw features the much-hyped return of Hulk Hogan, The Undertaker, and you would feel that if Daniel Bryan were to make the Orton/Batista main event a triple-threat match as rumoured, it would need to happen on tonight's show. Even then, when you consider that WWE shouldered the blame for not hyping him sufficiently after his SummerSlam main event returned a poor buyrate, simply adding him to the match out of sympathy without earning it would seem to be equally weak build. They need something, though. There's only so long they can ignore fans wishes while putting their hands out and asking for 6 month subscriptions.
In better news, The Wyatt Family emerged victorious in a fantastic six-man tag against The Shield that is thus far the WWE Match of the Year by a considerable distance. Titus O'Neill defeated former tag-team partner Darren Young in a match that, while poorly received by the live audience, was a success by being on the show alone. While Big E, the New Age Outlaws and AJ Lee all retained their titles against Jack Swagger, The Usos and Cameron respectively. Oh, and Bad News Barrett interrupted the show regularly to deliver a lot of Bad News (including one bit sponsored by the WWE Network).
Here are the highlights of the show, as told by Twitter...
There is, literally, a first for everything...
Good lord, there's a Curtis Axel chant #WWEChamber
— The History of WWE (@TheHistoryofWWE) February 24, 2014
There's not nearly enough, "My Da would bash your Da" matches in WWE today...
The Rhodes win, thus settling the issue: their Dad was a better nWo member than Curtis' dad #wwechamber@TNACreative@Maffewgregg
— Justin Henry (@JRHWriting) February 24, 2014
Usually this is the case. However when it's Big E/Jack Swagger...
1st match on any PPV is unquestionably important. #WWEChamber
— Jim Ross (@JRsBBQ) February 24, 2014
True story...
@AKATheMaskedMan His name used to be Big F, for Federation, but he lost it in a copyright dispute.
— Rick Nash (@AMTRick) February 24, 2014
Down with that sort of thing...
Feck yeah! RT @rdwburns: Father Ted is the origin for all of the best WWE feuds, eh @OSWreview? pic.twitter.com/eKzoFXi0iK — Jay Hunter (@OSWreview) February 24, 2014
Dear GOD, this is awkward...
"@WackProducer: waiting on @zekewwe vs Darren Young" you'll be waiting for a really long time — Ezekiel Jackson (@zekewwe) February 24, 2014
The Hogan return jokes write themselves...
Can't wait for Hogan to join The Real Americans. Never Forget: He called Yokozuna ''a Jap'' at Wrestlemania IX.
— MaffewOfBotchamania (@Maffewgregg) February 24, 2014
Yeah there's really no defending this...
We have the best medical staff in the world yet @WWEDanielBryan is still bandaged like a bad mummy costume #WWEChamber — WWE Creative Humor (@WWECreative_ish) February 24, 2014
" Oh you didn't know?" No Road Dogg, nobody did. Because it didn't happen...
Road Dogg said they main evented WrestleMania. I think I understand. He once hallucinated that he was Bret and Billy was HBK #WWEChamber
— The History of WWE (@TheHistoryofWWE) February 24, 2014
Oh say can you CM Punk!...
FANS WERE CHANTING CM PUNK WHILE LILLIAN GARCIA SANG THE NATIONAL ANTHEM AT WRESTLEMANIA 28? WILD. — typicalROHfan (@typicalROHfan) February 24, 2014
Hogan/Savage, Flair/Steamboat, Austin/Rock, think about it guys this one definitely checks out...
All great feuds include the part where one guy steals another guy's whistle #WWEChamber
— WWE Creative Humor (@WWECreative_ish) February 24, 2014
Said after Bad News Barrett interrupted following the Titus O'Neill/Darren Young match...
“Why is this appropriate after that match?” - @JCLayfield. #WWEChamber — Rick Nash (@AMTRick) February 24, 2014
This is believable since he did sing, "I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart," just last week on Raw...
Wyatt finally finishes "We're here" with "we're queer, we don't want any more bears."
— Kayfabe News (@KayfabeNews) February 24, 2014
It's like someone pushed a button on his back that said 'Amazing'...
Seth Rollins just got himself more over in the past 60 seconds than I have seen in a long time #WWEChamber — The History of WWE (@TheHistoryofWWE) February 24, 2014
I was chanting Mabel...
We want Mabel! We want Mabel! #RIPViscera
— Kayfabe News (@KayfabeNews) February 24, 2014
This stopped being ironic once he landed on his feet from a top-rope German suplex...
Believe in Seth Rollins. #SHIELDvsWyatts #WWEChamber pic.twitter.com/ngJjntM4W3 — The Fans Podcast (@TheFansPodcast) February 24, 2014
I dunno, personally I'd say, "DJSJSODPSOALVKOJNJISIFHIHDIH", but that's just me...
Ways of describing this match in one word. "HDHUWHUHUIWFHIUFHUWFUWFUIFHUIFHUWFHUIWFHUI" #WWEChamber
— WrestlingNewsSource (@WNSource) February 24, 2014
Tommy Dreamer was among many admirers...
FreeBirds vs Von Erichs Wouldn't have had them touch till Mania @davescherer Totally loving @TheShieldWWE vs @WWEBrayWyatt family Old school
— Tommy Dreamer (@THETOMMYDREAMER) February 24, 2014
Best description I saw...
That was basically the wrestling version of The Avengers film. — MaffewOfBotchamania (@Maffewgregg) February 24, 2014
All you need to know about the Divas match...
Suddenly thousands of bladders need emptying
— Jay Hunter (@OSWreview) February 24, 2014
We all got fooled into believing this would happen...
Oh my God, if Del Rio sends out Doink in his place... #WWEChamber — Razor (@kickoutblog) February 24, 2014
This is, like, the fifth Simpsons reference now. Elimination Chamber was basically an episode of The Simpsons that Americans had to pay for...
Smithers, are they booing me? ''No, they're chanting Bootista.'' Are you chanting Boo or Bootista? ''BOOTISTA!'' Oh, fair enough.
— MaffewOfBotchamania (@Maffewgregg) February 24, 2014
Preach it Tommy...
Dear @wwe if you don't start listening to your audience they will stop supporting you. Just ask EVERY professional sports team FRANCHISE — Tommy Dreamer (@THETOMMYDREAMER) February 24, 2014
Yep...
Batista walks alone. Wrestling fans run in the other direction. #WWEChamber
— Kayfabe News (@KayfabeNews) February 24, 2014
It's history in the making. The bad kind of history...
Can't wait to be apart of the biggest crowd to ever shit on a match during the Wrestlemania 30 main event. — Councilman Howser (@TimWelcomed) February 24, 2014
It describes everyone's mood...
This describes my attitude to the Batista/Del Rio match. #WWEChamber pic.twitter.com/cVb5hjrWUX
— Breanne Clarke (@RocknSparkle_x) February 24, 2014
Like a paid piñata...
@AMTRick Feel bad for Christian, his only job tonight is to take an absolute hiding off everyone else in the #WWEChamber — Barry Connaughton (@BarryTheconman) February 24, 2014
The start of the match on Twitter was like a debate about contraception, a lot of Christian-bashing...
Christian could win this match, and STILL not trend on Twitter. #WWEChamber — A Vanilla Midget (@aVanillaMidget) February 24, 2014
He knows his role...
Glad @WWECesaro fought @JohnCena's STF for a solid 3 seconds before tapping #WWEChamber
— WWE Creative Humor (@WWECreative_ish) February 24, 2014
Everyone's thoughts as Kane came down to get rid of the Wyatts...
Eurgh, here's where it all goes terribly. — HEELWrestling (@HEELWrestling) February 24, 2014
Shoutout to the one person on the planet who didn't see the finish coming...
THIS IS AMAZING!!!!!! BRYAN'S WINNING #WWECHAMBER
— Saif (@SaifQuadri) February 24, 2014
That's money...
Shot after shot of fans looking disgusted at our product should really help sell WrestleMania #WWEChamber
— WWE Creative Humor (@WWECreative_ish) February 24, 2014
WWE Elimination Chamber - Quick Results
- Kickoff Show: CODY RHODES & GOLDUST over RYBACK & CURTIS AXEL (w/LARRY 'THE AXE' HENNIG)
- Intercontinental Champion, BIG E over JACK SWAGGER
- WWE Tag-Team Champions, NEW AGE OUTLAWS over THE USOS
- TITUS O'NEILL over DARREN YOUNG
- 6-Man Tag-Team Match: THE WYATT FAMILY over THE SHIELD
- CAMERON over Divas Champion, AJ LEE by DQ. AJ retains.
- BATISTA over ALBERTO DEL RIO
- Elimination Chamber: WWE Champion, RANDY ORTON over DANIEL BRYAN, JOHN CENA, CESARO, CHRISTIAN & SHEAMUS
Stay tuned to the WWE Parties Ireland Facebook page as details of our WWE WrestleMania Party in Woolshed Baa & Grill will be released TONIGHT!
