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The Latest Rob Ford Scandal Involves American Football And Goose Shit

The Latest Rob Ford Scandal Involves American Football And Goose Shit
By Ben Kiely

Toronto Mayor/crack cocaine enthusiast Rob Ford is in the news again. This time some unsavoury stories are emerging of the Canadian politician when he was a high school American football coach. Ford spent a decade coaching Don Bosco Catholic Secondary School football and during his tenure he left a lasting impression on the school, for all the wrong reasons.

The laundry list of Ford's past mistakes include forcing his players to roll in goose feces, threatening to beat up a teacher, showing up ossified drunk to a training session, ignoring to complete criminal background checks, running up a $5,000 bill for helmets the school had to pay after he promised to take care of it and holding an improper summer practice in which a player broke a collar bone.

The threat of physical violence occurred when Ford tried to hold a practice before the school term began, which is a violation of the schools' and the athletic commission's rules. John Royiwsky went to post a note on the dressing room doors informing everyone that there would be no practice when Ford challenged him to a fight.

“I will kick your ass, Fuck you, you’re a pussy. I run this program not you."

Ford proceeded with the practice anyway and one of his players went home with a broken collarbone.

This incident is nothing compared to making the players roll in goose shit while calling them "cock suckers". The question remains where did he find enough goose excrement that an entire American Football team could slosh around in. On second thought, is that a question you really want an answer to?

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