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Vladimir Klitschko Lashes Tyson Fury - In The Name Of The Queen And Elton John

Conor Neville
By Conor Neville
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Vladimir Klitschko, former World Heavyweight champion and current champion of liberal values, has been reading the criticism of the recent conqueror and upcoming opponent, Tyson Fury. He has spied an opportunity to win some easy PR points.

Like all right-minded folk, Klitschko is appalled by what has come out of Fury's mouth. He seems particularly upset by its implications for the Queen and Elton John.

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We claim no special concern for these two people but one couldn't disagree with his noble sentiments.

I’m not okay with what comes out of Fury’s mouth, his statements.

For example — that all homosexual men and women and paedophiles belong in the same place, in jail basically. That all women belong in the kitchen and on their back.

So that is basically where he sees Elton John and the Queen.

To all people who say the same and think the same way out there, and to you Fury — I want to say fuck off.

Andy Lee did something vaguely similar ahead of his world title defence last December. This was after Tyson Fury's blood brother Billy Joe Saunders issued his treatise on the proper status of women. Billy Joe said women were best suited for 'hard sex, cooking, cleaning, washing up and sex.' Lee said he proposed to deliver a painful lesson to Klitschko on behalf of women.

Lee was on the side of the angels, but, as in the heavyweight title fight in Dusseldorf, and the Mayweather-Pacquaio fight, the generally agreed bad boy won out.

In the future, all boxing matches will have a 'which side are you on' political dimension.

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