Last night in Las Vegas, at a press conference to promote UFC 196, Nate Diaz extended his arm and Conor McGregor slapped it and many bald men ran on stage to separate the fighters. Some are calling it 'the Kerfuffle'. Hours later, the duo appeared on the Fox Sports programme 'Jay & Dan' for an eight-minute long debate that featured extensive swearing plus discussion of whether Americans know what gazelles are. According to insiders, the interview was conducted under extreme security.
McGregor and Diaz are doing satellite interviews in different rooms at MGM. Outside each room is about six police officers.
— Ariel Helwani (@arielhelwani) March 3, 2016
Pointlessly, I have spent the afternoon transcribing the interview. Here are the best parts. Apologies for failing to put coherence on this thing.
ON THE NOW FAMOUS SLAP AT THE PRESS CONFERENCE
CMcG: The man’s afraid to look me dead in the eye. So he put a frame out in front of me. And i quickly snatched it and broke it.
ND: Yea right. Yeah you motherbleep cheesy. I’ll put you to sleep. Gijon mutherfucker.
CMcG: 'Cause I'm a don. That’s what dons do. Your whole suit. My socks are worth more that that whole suit you had on you little bum. You broke bitch. I can buy and sell you.
ND: Bleep bleep bleep bleep.
CMcG: I can buy and sell you 100 times over.
HAS MCGREGOR CHANGED HIS APPROACH FOR FIGHTING DIAZ?
CMcG: The only approach I changed is I dug the grave a little bit longer, a little bit wider for Nate’s skinny fat long body. That’s the only difference I made.
ND: Look at the lineups. He had five little nobodies. Look at my last 20 fights. He better step it up for this one.
CMcG: His last fight was a decision. I bounce heads off the canvas every time.
ND: Against a normal sized human being.
DOES MCGREGOR NOW DISLIKE THE DIAZ BROTHERS NOW?
CMcG: No. there’s no emotions in it. I have no problem with him. I’m going to slap the head off him. It's business as usual
ND: You’re gonna bleep
CMcG: I'll bury him. You know, I’ll let his gazelle team...
ND: You gotta recognize because he know’s what’s real. He knows this is the real bleep
CMcG: You know...
ND: You know...
CMcG: You know it’s real bleep...
ND: You know it’s real bleep...
CMcG: You know it’s real bleep...
ND: You know it’s real bleep...
CMcG: You know it’s real bleep and you’ll know Saturday night.
ND: Yeah right.
WILL MCGREGOR BE GOING FOR A KNOCKOUT?
ND: He better hope he gets that knockout otherwise it’s going to be a fucked night for him.
CMcG: If he’s still conscious when he hits that mat, I will crush his hips and pass his guard and mount him and strangle him.
ND: You got tapped out by two nobodies.
CMcG: I'll strangle him
ND: How are you the best if you ain’t never heard of the guys who tapped you out?
CMcG: Like a boa constrictor wrapped around his long frame...
ND: No one knows those guys.
CMcG: A boa constrictor wrapped around a gazelle.
ND: You were submitted by lames. That’s not even that long ago. It was like a week ago.
IS DIAZ WORRIED ABOUT THE LARGE TRAVELLING IRISH CONTINGENT?
ND: No. Never. I got Irish fans hitting me up too. I got 'em out there
ANY LAST WORDS?
CMcG: The talking is done. We’re ready to fight now. This is just bullshit. All this just going back and forth. We’re ready to fight now. It’s primed. It’s sold. Let’s bleep do it.
ND: No I don't. He don't believe his prediction
CMcG: I believe I'm gonna bounce your head off the canvas.
ND: You don't believe. No. Those bleepers they believe it, you don’t even believe that. You hope. You hope.
CMcG: You better hope.
ND: You don't believe that bleep bleep believe.
CMcG: I believe that you can’t do nothing but survive. That’s what you believe. You’re just praying you can survive.
ND: Yeah right. Look at my lineup. Bleep
CMcG: I can hear it in your voice. I can hear it in your words. You’re just hoping to survive in there. If you get out of the second, if you get out of the first round, you’re happy.
ND: You’re a staged rich kid. You’re a staged rich kid. Rich people shouldn't fight. Rich kids shouldn't fight ever. Real people should fight. Real fighters fight. Not rich fucking kids
CMcG: I will gut you like a fish. You bleep thick
ND: You were born rich
CMcG: You don’t know me. You don’t know where the bleep I came from. You bleep twerp. I’ll ride into Stockton and bleep take everyone out. Full of snitches in Stockton.
ND: Mmhmm
CMcG: Never heard of Stockton in my life. Canaries in Stockton yeah? Sing like little canaries I hear.
ND: Why you calling people gazelles too? You’ve got the weakest lamest little lamest lineup of training partners I ever even heard of.
CMcG: I’m just looking at your little frame. And it just reminds me of an injured gazelle. Strapped up.
ND: People don't know what that means.
CMcG: Take your top off.
ND: No one knows what that means. This is America
CMcG: Take your top off. Take your top off. You little fat skinny bitch.
ND: Yeah right. No one know a gazelle is. This is America motherfucker. Get it right.
Watch the whole thing for yourself if you'd like more context.
