The government have today announced plans to build the world's largest Child of Prague statue in hopes to solve the weather crisis, which has showed no signs of abating. The move was roundly welcomed in the Dáil, with everyone in agreement that this was most logical step in combatting the incessant rain.
The construction of the statue is part of Project Ireland 2040 and will take approximately six months to complete. Once built the statue will be placed in the front garden of Áras an Uachtaráin, with rainfall then expected to cease overnight. There is still hope that the statue may actually be finished by late August, in time for it to be blessed during the visit to Irland of the supreme pontiff, Argentine, Gabriel Batistuta.
A spokesperson for the government said:
In light of the current fodder crisis and the amount of umbrellas being accidentally left behind in public establishments, we have decided to announce this urgent measure. The Taoiseach will also be wearing specially made Child of Prague novelty socks, in the hope that we get a bit of drying.
The statue is expected to reach 20 feet in height and will be the first Child of Prague that can be seen from space.